we get a fair amount of clothes and not all of it lives up to our standards of fun / fucked up. when we get an egregious surplus, our mode is now to give it out to weird punkers who sew, dye, draw on, and generally mangle the garments into something presentable. careena made this one, i love the emoticons, and i love idea of a shirt that expresses the idea “i do not like this shirt”.

careena shirt - $5

whiteout style on a homerun sundae collection.

mad plastic hats for tiny players - $.75
you seriously can’t wear these hats unless your head is the size of two scoops of ice cream (your choice flavor).

full gallery after the cut, except i sold the san diego padres “punk’S not Dead” before i could take a picture of it.
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and if you told me to put your birthday in, i probably did. i forgot to put in holidays though, all i got was halloween and the day of the st patrick’s day parade. anyway if you want one they are $5 on the internet from fujichia online ordering mechanism (FOOM). or wing by the store, where they cost less (that’s how it goes, mang).

also, big ups to mike bell smith, nperks and DRM for big-upping us on the internet players ball that is year in the internet 2006! chirp chirp! hey mike, me and ML played actual (not virtual) POGs for the first time the other day at the store and we got super into it and these high school girls were laughing at us and we were like “fuck you guys, we’re poggggggggggggggin’!”.

oh, and while lots of new eyeballs are reading this now (maybe), i should say that it is by no means too late to get started on a shoebox diorama for our dioramarama! the deadline is the 20th of january, which really means any time before the 1st. anyone can participate, and yes, there will be prizes awarded. and if you submit a diorama you will be able to put on your CV that you were in a group show with ben jones‘ dad. for realllllllllllllll. full information just follow the link above.

i don’t know who can’t finish a lollypop in one go, but for those who can’t there exists a whole host of candies with their own built-in savers. the candy inside this weird hatchet-wielding scotsman is completely disgusting, which has to be one of the most-often-true non-self-reflexive statements in the history of the english language.

candy scotsman- $1

i realize that it’s weird that this probably cost $.50 new and now the candy is half-sucked and the price has increased by 100%. i also realize that it’s weird that water expands when it freezes and that conditions on earth were perfect for life to arise.

ryan brigade, who made the afore-mentioned mesothelioma patch, made us this awesome crust logo out of tarantula legs and the sound of glass breaking. i’m psyched, although i have to admit that when he showed it to me i was a little disappointed because i could read it. but then again, i knew what to look for. i’m going to make patches and t-shirts out of this obviously, but before i do, i’d like to know what other people see in this. what other words can you make out? what about if you look at it upside down or sideways?

here’s my man neil hard-repping futures-of-the-past: wearing jen mcmahon’s aborted “futurama” halloween glasses and talking into a “merlin”, the early handheld game with weird buttons. stay fly, neil!

some would have it that on the back of this glove stands a turtle and on that turtle’s back the world. others would posit that there is no elephant glove and it’s just turtles all the way down. this glove is so fucked i love to have it just to see people put it on and struggle with its meaning every single day. which is why i have priced it at $3 a head. modeled by laura!

elephant head glove - $15